I heard something on the radio today that kind of rubbed me the wrong way. It was just a quick little story about a certain football team returning home after a big win in some big game. They landed at the airport with tons of fanfare and had a hero's welcome as they rode through their capital city.
Now I am not big into football, but I'm not a hater either. I like getting together with friends, eating yummy food, and having a good time. Whether or not I see all of the game doesn't really bother me. My opinion may be a bit different from a die-hard football fan. I am more biased these days and therefore I may be blowing this out of proportion.
I am all for people celebrating. I know I love a good party. What bugged me was the fact that a bunch of athletes got a hero's welcome home because they played a game of football. Yes, it was a BIG game, but what exactly did they do that was heroic? Did they risk or give their lives to save or better the lives of others? Did they sacrifice themselves for a greater good? Did they put aside their fears and give everything because of a duty to serve their country and preserve freedom?
A little perspective:
*Pro football players are paid millions of dollars to run, throw, kick, catch and tackle for our amusement.
*Active Duty soldiers are paid a small fraction of that to keep our country safe and free.
*Pro football players live in big beautiful houses, with all the latest technology.
*Chris and his unit are currently each living in a 6.5 x 7.5 ft. room with no windows. And have spotty, slow, and non-reliable internet service and must wait in line to use the phone.
*Pro football players have the best food available to them at any and all times.
*Soldiers in theatre get the equivalent of school cafeteria food on a good day and MRE's (Meal Ready-t0-Eat~~food rations) on a bad.
I think that sometimes the wrong people are praised (or it is, people praising the wrong thing?) As my girls grow up, I want them to know what a real hero is. Not just heros of the military, but Biblical hero's, martyrs, political, etc.
Thanks for letting me get on my soapbox and speak my mind.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Day One Hundred and two
Sunday's have proven to be hard days for me. I wake up and just feel different. It becomes more evident on Sunday's that my life is different. Sunday's are for family. While I still have my 4 sweet girls, we are not complete without Chris.
I was feeling especially down this morning. Chris tried Skyping us but his connection was really bad (again) and we only had a few minutes of conversation. Even though that happens all the time, it got to me today and I started crying. I just wanted to talk to him. You know, have a normal conversation. God heard me crying and soon after my cell phone rang and Chris was on the other line loud and clear and with no delay.
You would think that after being able to talk to Chris I would be thankful, happy and content. Nope. I am selfish and greedy. I want more. I want him home. I fell deeper into despair. Deeper into self pity. Whoa is me. And here I thought that getting through the first 100 days would make things better. Easier. I was wrong. (again)
So there I was, in the van, driving to church when I heard this song.
I've heard this song a few times before but today these words spoke to me.
"...Why are you crying? Let Me lift up your face. Just don't turn away....
Cause I'll be by your side wherever you fall. In the dead of night whenever you call.
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you. MY hands are holding you.
...Cause I love you. I want you to know that I, I love you. I'll never let you go!"
I feel like I do fight God's hands. I fight His plans by trying to force my own. But in God's grace and mercy He gently says "Sarah, I have you. I have you right in My hands and I know this journey is hard. But no matter what I am with you. Trust in Me."
Oh, Lord please help me to listen to Your voice. Let Your words sink deep into my heart and become set in my mind. Amen.
I was feeling especially down this morning. Chris tried Skyping us but his connection was really bad (again) and we only had a few minutes of conversation. Even though that happens all the time, it got to me today and I started crying. I just wanted to talk to him. You know, have a normal conversation. God heard me crying and soon after my cell phone rang and Chris was on the other line loud and clear and with no delay.
You would think that after being able to talk to Chris I would be thankful, happy and content. Nope. I am selfish and greedy. I want more. I want him home. I fell deeper into despair. Deeper into self pity. Whoa is me. And here I thought that getting through the first 100 days would make things better. Easier. I was wrong. (again)
So there I was, in the van, driving to church when I heard this song.
I've heard this song a few times before but today these words spoke to me.
"...Why are you crying? Let Me lift up your face. Just don't turn away....
Cause I'll be by your side wherever you fall. In the dead of night whenever you call.
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you. MY hands are holding you.
...Cause I love you. I want you to know that I, I love you. I'll never let you go!"
I feel like I do fight God's hands. I fight His plans by trying to force my own. But in God's grace and mercy He gently says "Sarah, I have you. I have you right in My hands and I know this journey is hard. But no matter what I am with you. Trust in Me."
Oh, Lord please help me to listen to Your voice. Let Your words sink deep into my heart and become set in my mind. Amen.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Day One hundred and one
Wings, Friends, and another day.
Today was our 100 day gathering at The Watering Hole. I just want to thank my sweet friends, sister, and other unit wives for coming and eating. Here are some of our memories:
"Chris" was here.
The Wives.
Yummy Food.
Sweet Friends.
Another "Daddy" and his wife and kiddo's.
You know the wings are good when the sauce
is all over your face!
"Chris" finally getting his grilled hot wings.
Napkin please.
"Chris", Ruby, and Aunt Janis.
"Chris" and Andy
Me and My Man
"Chris" and the kids.
"Daddy" with his girls.
Wings make you silly ;)
Our family.
Day One Hundred
Day 100 is here, and it's a bittersweet day.
It's been 100 days of me missing my husband and the girls missing their daddy.
100 days of all of us missing his hugs. Missing him coming in the door after work. Missing him singing "Take me out to the ballgame" to the girls at night. Missing his dirty socks balled up at the end of the couch. Missing our family being all together.
For me the one of the hardest parts is having to go to bed all alone. No goodnight hug or kiss. My arm wanders over to his side of the bed and instead of finding his strong arms I find cold sheets. Everynight as I get into bed I say out loud, "Good night Christopher. I love you!" And sometimes a "see you in the morning" slips out. That doesn't go over very with my heart. I know that in the morning I will wake up and the only thing that will be on the other side of the bed is the same empty spot that was there the night before. I really miss him.
While all of the above is my reality, Chris has it 100 times worse. At least I get hugs and kisses from our girls. I get to sleep in our own familar bed. I am only missing one major part of my normal life and he is missing ALL. Despite that, he has a pretty good attitude. Way better than I would have. He amazes me.
There are a few upsides of having 100 days go by....We don't ever have to do them again! We don't have to go backward and relive any of these past days. They are forever behind us! Yes, we have missed a lot of things but we have never been completely alone. God has been with us every step of the way and many times carrying us through the day. Seeing and feeling His presence is one thing that has made this journey worthwhile. It is God who will give me the strength I need to make it the rest of the 265 days.
"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8
It's been 100 days of me missing my husband and the girls missing their daddy.
100 days of all of us missing his hugs. Missing him coming in the door after work. Missing him singing "Take me out to the ballgame" to the girls at night. Missing his dirty socks balled up at the end of the couch. Missing our family being all together.
For me the one of the hardest parts is having to go to bed all alone. No goodnight hug or kiss. My arm wanders over to his side of the bed and instead of finding his strong arms I find cold sheets. Everynight as I get into bed I say out loud, "Good night Christopher. I love you!" And sometimes a "see you in the morning" slips out. That doesn't go over very with my heart. I know that in the morning I will wake up and the only thing that will be on the other side of the bed is the same empty spot that was there the night before. I really miss him.
While all of the above is my reality, Chris has it 100 times worse. At least I get hugs and kisses from our girls. I get to sleep in our own familar bed. I am only missing one major part of my normal life and he is missing ALL. Despite that, he has a pretty good attitude. Way better than I would have. He amazes me.
There are a few upsides of having 100 days go by....We don't ever have to do them again! We don't have to go backward and relive any of these past days. They are forever behind us! Yes, we have missed a lot of things but we have never been completely alone. God has been with us every step of the way and many times carrying us through the day. Seeing and feeling His presence is one thing that has made this journey worthwhile. It is God who will give me the strength I need to make it the rest of the 265 days.
"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Day Ninety-nine
Hallelujah!! We all got out of the house today! School for the big 2, the Y for Mommy and the little 2. A lunch date at McD's with a friend and her 2 little girls and grocery shopping. We were gone the entire day. While it was nice to get out and about, coming home to our own 4 walls was the highlight of the day.
The girls and I have finally decided what to do for Day 100. We are going to go to one of Chris' favorite resturants and pig out!! So...off to The Watering Hole we go on Saturday. For those of you who live nearby and would like to join us, we are hoping to get there by noon. "Chris" would be happy to see you and I would love to get some pictures of "him" there to send to him.
I learned something about Ruby today. Once she gets an idea in her head she doesn't let it go until she does it. I've noticed a little bit of this in her before but today was nuts! While we were shopping she was getting crabby, so I started talking to her about lipstick, lip gloss, and make-up--one of her favorite subjects. I mentioned that maybe when she was older she should write a magazine about all the different types lipsticks there are and which ones were her favorite. Her big blue eyes grew even bigger and a smile spread across her face and she asked if she could do it right now. No matter how I tried to explain that I meant for her to do it when she was an adult, she wouldn't let the idea go. She was so excited and already had a plan on how she would accomplish it. And thanks to her big sister Grace, Ruby got her little magazine done tonight.
Ruby came up with the name and
website on her own. The person
in her picture is Daddy.
Grace wrote down the names and Ruby
put a little sample of each lip gloss on
the pages.
The magazine smells good too.
**Here is a photo for Wordless Wednesday that I forgot to add. It is too funny to miss.
Before you freak out... Zoe wanted us to put
these on her and they are plastic.
Dear God, I am so greatful and blessed that Ruby has been entrusted to me to be her mommy. Please help me to be the mommy she deserves and needs. Please show me how to guide her determination so that she uses it for Your glory. I want to be like Ruby in the way she doesn't let obstacles, or people telling her that she can't do something stand in her way to accomplish her mission. She stays focused and confident. Thank you for this precious jewel!
In Jesus name, Amen
I am Thankful for...
91. Sunshine.
92. Mexican food.
93. Finding 12oz. bags of Peanut M&M's for only .50! I bought 6 bags :)
94. God's faithfulness.
95. Ruby's determination.
96. Grace's helpfulness.
97. Addie's big hugs.
98. Zoe's silliness.
99. My Husband's sacrifice, hard work, and integrity in serving his country.
100. Knowing that time, distance, and bad phone connections can't and won't lessen how much I love Chris and he loves me!!
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Day Ninety-eight
Wordless Wednesday~~ Ok, I really need to change the name of this day. It's obvious that I can never remain wordless. Any suggestions??? Should I keep the name and just try and shut-up?
I am Thankful for:
81. Cozy sweatshirts. Thanks Chris for leaving so many behind. I could send you 1 or 2 if you want.
82. Yummy leftovers.
83. Being able to skype with Chris today.
84. Finally being able to leave the house today. Even if was just to the little grocery store here in town.
85. Zoe's crazy funny laugh.
86. Chocolate Chip Cookies and Milk
87. Being able to take a little nap this afternoon.
88. God's provision
89. Hearing Zoe say "I wuv oo Daddy"
90. SCHOOL Tomorrow!!
Here's what happens when we get bored on Snow Days:
Decided to give "Chris" as
mustache just like the real Chris.
Someone took my spot!
Ruby's special Snow Day outfit.
Sister's
My crazies!
Play-doh!!
Um....yeah.
Yikes! I know scary!
Even Buddy misses Chris.
Ruby made this picture and told me
it was Daddy. She said she gave it to me so I
could see Daddy everyday So sweet!
I am Thankful for:
81. Cozy sweatshirts. Thanks Chris for leaving so many behind. I could send you 1 or 2 if you want.
82. Yummy leftovers.
83. Being able to skype with Chris today.
84. Finally being able to leave the house today. Even if was just to the little grocery store here in town.
85. Zoe's crazy funny laugh.
86. Chocolate Chip Cookies and Milk
87. Being able to take a little nap this afternoon.
88. God's provision
89. Hearing Zoe say "I wuv oo Daddy"
90. SCHOOL Tomorrow!!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Day Ninety-seven
After an encouraging little texting conversation with a friend this afternoon, my spirits were lifted and chocolate chip cookies were made. It's amazing what a simple little thing like a few texts can do to change how I was feeling. --Thank you so much K.B. It got me out of my funk and I actually accomplished more, had a better attitude, made a real dinner, and even played a game with the 3 older girls before bedtime.
I am thankful for:
71. Text messages.
72. Watching Zoe and Ruby dance.
73. Making cookies with Addie.
74. Hugs from Grace.
75. My snow blower starting on my first try.
76. Warm showers.
77. February being a short month.
78. Hearing my girls laugh.
79. Hearing Chris tell me he loves me.
80. The heating pad that is soothing my aching back.
All gone!
Pasta a la Betsy!
From Pioneer Woman
Oh so Yummy!!
I am thankful for:
71. Text messages.
72. Watching Zoe and Ruby dance.
73. Making cookies with Addie.
74. Hugs from Grace.
75. My snow blower starting on my first try.
76. Warm showers.
77. February being a short month.
78. Hearing my girls laugh.
79. Hearing Chris tell me he loves me.
80. The heating pad that is soothing my aching back.
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