Day Three hundred and seven

Wordless Wednesday~~Sewing projects and "Dorothy" from the Wizard of Oz.

Onesie for Katherine

"Birthday Barbie" shirt for Ruby's

friend Kynzie.

Onesie for MOPS giveaway. I'm not quiet done

with it; still need to do the stitching around it.

Addie being "Dorothy" in the display window

at the library at school. Every 4th grade

girl gets to take a turn dressing up and being

"Dorothy" after school.

My brown-eyed girl. Addie did such a great

job today. She handled all the kids staring at

her very well. Full of smiles!

Day Three hundred and six

Thankful Tuesday:

"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to Him in song." Ps. 28:7

Today I am thankful for,

• Extra hugs and kisses from the girls at bedtime.
• Biscuits and gravy for dinner.
• My mom showing me how to make sausage gravy.
• My Grandpa P for giving me the love for biscuits and gravy. He always made the best!
• A phone call from a friend who just knew I needed one.
• The gentle reminder that God is always with me. Will I take the time to recognize it? 
• Watching Zoe's imagination bloom.
• Hearing the sounds of my kids laughing and playing with the neighbor kids. Especially when they don't know I'm listening.
• Bedtime in general.
• Bing Cherries by the handful.

Day Three hundred and five

It feels like it comes from out of nowhere and then POW! It's like a punch in the stomach. That lonely feeling. The feeling of just not wanting to do this another day alone.

I miss having Daddy home. Being the only parent and the only responsible adult in the house is tiring. I'm the rule maker, the rule enforcer, the punishment giver, the cook, the cleaner, the everything! I'm tired.

I know I just had a nice little overnight break with the Diva's and you probably think that I'm being ridiculous. The break was nice but it felt like I was punished for it. As soon as I walked in the door reality smacked me in the face. The girls were being naughty, disrespectful and whiny. So not the "Mommy! You're home!" said with happy smiles as they come running to me with hugs ready I ensvisioned. Instead, I was shoved right into the Enforcer/Punisher role. As you can guess, it wasn't met with hugs and rainbows.

Today was better, but I'm still feeling the emotional aftershocks. Without having a lot of reserves stored up, I'm easily emptied. This journey has been long and drawn out. I'm so ready for the end. 60 days. I can do it. With God's help, I can do it.

"My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken." Ps. 62:1-2

Day Three hundred and four

Deployment Diva's Celebrate 300 days down!

We started our day meeting at Elyzabeth's

and then headed out to get pedi's.

Jill and Elyzabeth getting ready for

our night out.

Elyzabeth and Jobeth.

Me and Kendra.

Jobeth and Jill.

Jobeth and Kendra.

Sorry for it being fuzzy.

I copied it from a photo taken

with a camera phone.

They are really very beautiful!

The Double D's!

We were missing a couple of Diva's :(

Elyzabeth and I

"Out with the Diva's but thinking

about our Men"

Our cake

Blowing out the candles.

Jill and Kendra=civilized.

And then there was Jobeth and Elyzabeth...



Day Three hundred and three

Black&White~~Simple and Beautiful

Day Three hundred and two

The first full week of school is under our belt. I don't know about everyone else but I'm exhausted! We are at a new school with new ways of doing things, so that means we have LOTS of new things to learn. I think it's going to take a couple of weeks for us (read Mommy) to get used to everything.

Ruby is loving being a Kindergartner. She comes out of class with a huge smile on her face everyday. The first day she came running over to me and said, "Mom! I have new best friends!" I asked her what their names were and she smiled really big and said, "I don't know but they are really nice!" Typical Ruby.

The older 2 are adjusting. One day they say school is "OK" and the next they say "I don't like it.".  They really miss their friends from their old school. I know it's hard going to a new school and the girls are doing really well at handling it. I'm proud of them.

Day Three hundred and one

I'm one sleepy Momma. With that said, Good night.

"Guide me in Your truth and teach me, for You are God my Savior, and my hope is in You all day long." Ps. 25:5

Day Three Hundred

Wordless Wednesday~~ Can you believe it?!? Day 300. It truly feels like 1,000 today. Long exhausting day, but it ended well.

We started our 300th day with

"Daddy" and donuts on the way to school.

"Daddy" joined Ruby in her kindergarten class today. She won't let me

take pictures at school. Really? I thought Grace was the only one who

was too cool for that.

Dinner at BW3's with a fellow Diva and her girls.

Wings! Daddy and the girl's favorite.

Diva Kendra and me.

I look bald. As you can tell by the bags

under my eyes, it's been a long day.

A-dorable!

Kendra's Addie.

Grace being too busy watching the big screens

 to grant me one moment of her time to smile.

Mackie and Addie

This girl LOVES her wings.

The note that greeted me on the

end of Grace's bed on the first

day of school.

I know this doesn't have anything

to do with the other photos, but I

forgot I had it and I just had to share.

They crack me up!

Day Two hundred and ninety-nine

Thankful Tuesday~~

"Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good. His love endures forever." Ps. 136:1

I'm Thankful for:

• Zoe feeling better!
• Seeing Zoe's personality blossom a little more each day.
• Hearing my Hubby's voice on the phone this morning.
• Grace and Addie's improving attitudes.
• Brinner. Waffles and bacon.
• My healed washing machine.
• Reruns of The Office.
• Knowing God's mercy's will be new tomorrow.
• Day 299 is almost done!!!!
• My Mom.

Day Two hundred and ninety-eight

My sweet Zoe has been sick today. As much as I feel so bad for her, a little bit of me smiled. Not because she was feeling yucky but because I knew it meant that I would be spending most of my day cuddling with her. We snuggled up on the couch with blankies and pillows. She took turns between laying on my lap and resting on my shoulder. I loved feeling her heartbeat against me, smelling her hair and kissing her sweet face. These are cherished moments.

I wish I could stop time or at least stop her from growing up. She's my last baby and I don't want it to go by so fast. It doesn't feel all that long ago when my Gracie was just a little baby. The newness of motherhood was apparently fresh in everything I did. That same little girl is now 11 years old. Why does that time go by so fast and these last 298 days have gone so slow?

God, please slow the moments I have with Zoe. Help me to embrace this time I get to spend with her alone. Help to spend more time down on the floor playing, reading books, chasing her, singing with her and cuddling with her. I want this same desire to be an in-the-moment-mommy to spill over to my other kids. To stop talking first and listen more. To say "Yes" more than I say "No!". More "do what I do" and less "do what I say". Be the reflection of God's love and grace in every situation. And give them no reason in heaven and earth to ever doubt my love for them.
All of this happens by me first relying on You, Lord. My me giving up my ways, my worries, and my pride and surrender to You. It happens by me taking the girls out of my tight grip and remembering they are already being held gently in Your hands.
I thank You and praise You for Your unfailing love and unending grace. Amen



A cute little post script:
If I had to leave her to do something or get her something I would tell her, "I'll be right back honey". Zoe would respond by saying, "I not honey. I Zowee." 

Day Two hundred and ninety-seven

I can't believe that in 3 more days we will only have 65 more days before Chris comes home! It still feels like a very very long time but in the grand scheme of things it's just a blip on the radar screen. Ok, a BIG blip.

It's so nice to finally be able to see the end of the tunnel. Our normal life if just around the corner *and down the road about 50 miles, take the 2nd left, follow the winding road for another 10 miles and take the 4th right. And Viola!! we're there!! 

My prayer for this week is Psalm 19:14, "May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in Your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer."

Day Two hundred and ninety-six

Nice ending to a very hard week. Thank you Renee for suggesting a Girl's Movie Night. "The Help" was just as great the 2nd time as it was the first. Thank you Diva Elyzabeth for babysitting so I could escape the madness. Now it's off to bed feeling relaxed for the first time this week.

Day Two hundred and ninety-five

"Teach me, LORD, the way of Your decrees, that I may follow it to the end. Give me understanding, so that I may keep Your law and obey it with all my heart. Direct me in the path of Your commands, for there I find delight. Turn my heart toward Your statutes and not toward selfish gain. Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to Your word." Ps. 119:33-37

I wrote about this verse in the very early days of this blog. I have it taped to my mirror in my bathroom. You would think that I since I see it everyday that it has had a huge impact on me. Well, there is a difference between seeing something and actually reading and taking in the information you are reading. I have become so used to seeing it on the mirror that it's become just part of the decor. I would like to spend more time meditating on this verse in the next couple days.

I'm thinking about having Grace and Addie write out this verse and compose an essay about how they can apply it to their lives. Should I have them do that before or after I have them pull weeds in the flower bed? Consequences stink don't they.

Day Two hundred and ninety-four

"Oh, that my ways were steadfast in obeying Your decrees! " Ps. 119:5

"Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you" Proverbs 4:25

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:18

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before Him He endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider Him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:1-3

Heavenly Father,
You know how much I've been struggling with keeping my eyes on You. It's been such a hard week with the girls. Remaining calm as been the last thing on my mind. God please help me and give me the wisdom and strength I need to "Train up a child in the way (s)he should go, and when (s)he is old (s)he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6  It seems so much easier to just yell, scream and give up. Grounding, punishments, talks. Nothing is helping. 

Father, You can see into their hearts and minds and know why they are acting this way. Please help me to see them through Your eyes and give me insight into their emotions. I want to be the mom You intended me to be for them. Be the example You call me to be. I want You to be seen in my behavior no matter how bad they are acting. 

I love them so much, but I know You love them even more. Please fill us all with peace and "Set a guard over our mouths, LORD; keep watch over the door of our lips." Ps. 141:3

In Jesus' name, Amen.

     

Day Two hundred and ninety-three

Wordless Wednesday~~First Day of School. Grace and Addie made it through their first day at a new school and Ruby made more "best friends" at her first day of kindergarten. We even got a phone call from Daddy on our way to school.

Grace~6th grader

No, she's not ornery at all.

Addie~4th grader

Addie and "Daddy"

Ruby~kindergartner

I can't believe my RubyDoo is

old enough to be in school.

Ruby and "Daddy"

Daddy's girls'

Ruby's cubbie

Her desk.

The only picture Addie let me take

inside the school.

*Here would be the picture of Grace in her room, but she is too cool to allow me to take one.